I am moving to the Street …. StreetWraith Press, that is. You will find future posts at: www.streetwraith.net/holledolce/onthescene
I had something happen that I had never experienced before. I knew it could happen. I have even written about it happening to characters before.
I had never experienced it before, though. It was a little frightening, but also kind of amazing.
Writing erotica is about more than deciding when to use “pussy”, “vulva”, “clitoris”, and “sex.” It is more than avoid “member” (and “turgid member”) at all costs.
Like any kind of writing, it is about understanding the genre you are writing in, familiarizing yourself with its sub genres, and using your skill to create a story that conveys the idea in your head.
With this series, we’re going to delve deeper into the storytelling craft with erotica and understand when we need to develop complex plots and characters and when we need to just let them get down to the nitty-gritty.
I’ve said before, I am a Dominant – that is to say, I aspire to be a Dominant in the lifestyle. While I know a lot of things; I study; I read; I do all of the things to help me gain and share information (this blog is part of my learning experience, helping me to put together the things I learn as I go) I don’t feel ready to take on a submissive.
I don’t have the experience that would make me a responsible Dominant.
That is about to change. I am about to begin training. I’m nervous and excited about it.
If you’re like me, sometimes oral sex can be … tricky. Part of the problem, especially with finishing, is the taste. I tried flavored lubes and the just did not work that well. I would have to pile on the lube and it only added sweetness. It did not really cut inot the bitter flavor of the ejaculate. However, I discovered recently something that works very well for me and I wanted to share it. So, after the cut, we’ll be discussing oral sex tips.
As a freelance writer specializing in adult content, clients ask me to write a lot of articles about sex toys.
A lot of articles.
I say that for emphasis, not complaint. I like writing about sex and sex toys. I learn about toys that don’t apply to me – I have no need myself for a penis pump or sleeve, being a woman and all. I learn about toys that would not interest me personally but are neat. For example, did you know you can buy a realistic dildo that feels all fleshy and firm like a real penis … and squirts for you? Yeah. It includes a mix to make simulated jizm and a pump that lets you squeeze it out of the tip.
Wow, there is a lot to unpack this week. I am going to be talking about Donald Trump, Sexual Assault, and the leak from the weekend, so if any of that is triggering, be warned and ready before you read on.
Right, so …
So a tape leaked to the Washington Post with something Trump said just over a decade ago. To sum up, he talks first about pursuing a married woman and being turned down. He then talks about how he responds to beautiful women. In his words (all quotes lifted from Washington Post and the linked article),
“You know I’m automatically attracted to beautiful — I just start kissing them. It’s like a magnet. Just kiss. I don’t even wait.”
If being kissed immediately upon meeting a man is not bad enough, well, it gets worse from there.
“And when you’re a star, they let you do it,” Trump says. “You can do anything.”
“Whatever you want,” says another voice, apparently Bush’s.
“Grab them by the p—y,” Trump says. “You can do anything.”
So there is that statement … from a man accused of sexually assaulting and/or harassing multiple women, including an under-aged girl.
So Kim Kardashian was robbed at gun point in Paris. You probably did not know because you live under a rock, do not follow Facebook, Twitter, or Instagram, and in fact do not even have internet. You are reading this through smoke signals.
Right, so now that we are past what everyone knows, why am I writing about it? I am not even a Kardashian fan.
I am going to begin talking about Sex and Sexuality. While I can begin that conversations a lot of places, I thought something personal might be nice. Nothing, I thought, is more personal than Masturbation, so here we are. I will add other topics to this category as well, so please, enjoy.
When we picked up the conversation last time with Klaus, we talked about him and what made him successful with women: his confidence. He understood who he was, he knew what he wanted in women, and he projected both of these things. As he and I talked about approaching women, we talked about how he was sometimes just friends with women. That ability to befriend women is part of what made him so successful when he approached a woman he wanted to date or sleep with, so I wanted to dig deeper into that.
What is the Friend Zone?
So for a very long time, we have had this term we use called the “friend zone.” Men get a bad rap for using it, but to be perfectly honest with you, women use it as well. In fact, the idea of the friend zone was why I did not recognize Klaus’ advances at first. It was not so much that I had placed him in the friend zone. It was that I figured I would be there, that our mutual friends would have warned him away from me.
So okay, this idea of the friend zone is complicated because it can mean different things to different people. It can also mean different things in different contexts. I had crushes when I was younger, whom I was friends with, who only saw me as a friend. Yes, I considered myself in their “Friend Zone.” I had male friends that I used to consider in the “Friend Zone” not because I did not think them worthy of my lustful affections, but because they were friends.