Should We Teach with Erotica?

As I am preparing to put outline to story today, a thought occurred to me.

Can erotica guide and teach others?

We fool ourselves if we think that at least some readers do not try to emulate what they read in erotica. We already know of a tragic case where a young man hurt his friend because he wanted to experience (without proper consent unfortunately) his own Fifty Shades of Grey fantasy. While yes, I like to harp on how Fifty Shades romanticizes what is actually an abusive relationship, how consent is questionable (especially if you consider what Christian would reasonably know in a scene), and how it not only misrepresents but actually disrespects BDSM, if someone is either irresponsible enough to harm someone or wants to harm someone using your story as a “guide” or “inspiration” they will do so, no matter how responsibly you write your story.

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The Difference Between Fantasy and Fiction

I love writing erotic fiction. I sometimes enjoy reading it.


I do not like erotic fiction that blurs lines of consent or is disrespectful – to women, to men, to the community it is writing about, etc. Sometimes when I voice this, people will say “but it is only fantasy.”

And this is wrong.

There is a difference between fantasy and fiction, and I am going to explain that.

I think it is something that many erotica authors either miss or ignore, and our genre and its sub-genres hurt for it. Erotica can be erotic and it can still be respectful. It can sexualize respect and consent and be an incredibly erotic story. You just have to understand what a fantasy is, what drives that fantasy, and how to turn it into erotica. Continue reading