Discipline – It’s What You Do

So, I talked a little bit before about Discipline and how I would handle, in one respect at least, punishments.

I wanted to return to this topic because it is an important aspect of BDSM – it’s even part of the acronym. I certainly did not want to go very long without sharing some of my thoughts on Discipline, since my last discussion had focused on punishment so much.

In BDSM, what is Discipline?

Simply put, it is training. When we talk about training a submissive or training a slave, we are talking about Discipline. It encompasses all the rules that you set in place, the different protocols of your dynamic, and then what you use, positive and negative, to reinforce those protocols.

When I have a submissive, I plan to have a very simple protocol to begin a session.

  • When she arrives, I will ask her if she has anything she needs to discuss before we begin.
  • If she does not, or once any discussions are complete, I will ask her if she submits to me.
  • If she says yes, then she will kneel in a submissive posture. If she has a collar, I will place her collar on her. When I am ready for her to stand, I will bid her to do so, and we will go on to whatever activities will be taking place that day.

And I know right now that I just made someone blink their eyes in confusion, because I said something that may seem a little odd about collaring. I will get back to it in a moment. Continue reading


You Bad, Bad Girl

I wanted to get back to my thoughts about Submission and Respect.

I’ve been thinking about the Discipline aspect of BDSM a lot lately, and punishment in particular.

This might be something I come back to more, but I wanted to get down a few thoughts.

So, what is Discipline?

Outside of a dictionary definition, it is what I think of as the formal aspects of BDSM and D/s dynamics. So making rules and enforcing them, behavioral training, defining etiquette and enforcing it, etc. And I know that is very simplistic, but again, this is something I plan to come back to. Continue reading

Some Gals Just Like to Be Tied Up

For some disclosure … in my early adult life, I flitted from job to job, not really sure what I wanted to do. During this time, I found myself out of work and desperate. A close friend of mine had an interesting proposal. She needed a personal secretary, someone to answer phones and help keep her books. I would get some valuable experience and she would have the help she needed. It just happened to be this friend was a professional Dominatrix. From her, I was introduced into the BDSM sub-culture (or the Scene) of the 1990′s, not as an active participant, but an inside observer. I developed an interest in it that remains to this day.

BDSM has a wide interpretation. At its most basic, it is Bondage/Discipline, Dominance/Submission, and Sadism/Masochism. Each pairing has its own meanings and its own connotations. These connotations are not always good. We tend to think of sadism as cruelty or submission as weakness. While these images and meanings may play their part in the Scene, they do not define it or its different aspects.

Continue reading